A Limited View and Unconscious Bias Can Lead You Astray

Quick judgments and a limited view—fueled by bias—lead us astray. Using a Hawaii driving story, I show how a limited view causes mistakes and missed opportunities. The cure? Curiosity: ask “What else could be true?”, listen actively, and embrace “I don’t know—let’s find out.

I jump to conclusions.

My mind works fast. I’m a puzzle person, always scanning for pieces and assembling the bigger picture before all the information is in. Sometimes that serves me well. Other times? Not so much. It can be off-putting. Intimidating. Even wrong.

This week, a drive through the hills of Hawaii reminded me of just how easy it is to make confident — and completely inaccurate — judgments when you don’t have the full picture.

The Diamond Head Detour

While heading to a hike at Diamond Head in Waikiki, my passenger saw we were driving north and immediately declared, “See? I knew it was north!” They were pretty proud of themselves. That is, until I zoomed out the Apple CarPlay map and showed that we were actually looping around due to the island’s non-grid layout and one way streets. Turns out, Diamond Head was south after all.

It was a simple mistake, but it got me thinking — this is exactly how unconscious bias works.

🧠 When We Don’t See the Whole Picture

Our brains are wired to fill in gaps — it’s a survival trait. Fast judgments helped early humans avoid danger. But today, this evolutionary shortcut often backfires.

We Misinterpret Information

We all do it. Without realizing, our brains use past experiences, stereotypes, or assumptions to connect dots that aren’t actually connected. We think we’re being rational, but we’re often just operating on autopilot.

We Miss Opportunities

That same bias can cause us to dismiss people, ideas, or paths simply because they don’t fit our existing narrative. That means less innovation, less growth, and fewer meaningful connections.

🔑 The Antidote? Curiosity.

The good news: you can change this.

It starts with awareness. When we acknowledge that our perspective is limited and choose curiosity over certainty, we open the door to empathy, insight, and wiser decisions.

Here are a two ways to start practicing curiosity in everyday life:

🧠 It Starts With Awareness

• Notice when you're trying to be right. Ask yourself: “Am I trying to learn… or just win?” I’m hyper competitive. I know how it feels to try to be right. I have lived my life trying to be right. I have lost a friend or two because of this bad habit. I think I know better now, but it does rear its ugly head every now and then.

• Ask: “What else could be true?” Especially when you're irritated or sure you're right. This question alone can dissolve judgment and spark understanding. The fact is that we all have a tinted view of the world around us. It is only when we remove the hue that we can see what is actually true.

🛠️ That Lead to Actions

• Practice active listening. I did this just today. Instead of telling my realtor why I hate reality shows, I asked why she liked them. Her answer changed how I saw them. True listening invites connection. Although I am not sure I am going to start watching The Bachelor anytime soon.

• Replace judgment with genuine questions. Say: “What makes you think that could work?” instead of “That’s not going to work.”

• Say: “I don’t know — let’s find out.” This phrase doesn’t make you weak. It makes you trustworthy, human, and a better leader. And in the process of finding out, everyone learns. This reminds me of a time when I was building a house. A neighbor, who was a builder, was about 2 months ahead of us. When we wandered over to check out his foundation, my husband (at the time) asked him questions that I knew he knew the answers to. He did that to learn. In my youthful, ego-filled head, all I could think was “he looks so stupid asking those questions. That guy is going to think we are ill equipped to build our own house”. The point is that I understand it can be uncomfortable to admit you don’t know. Your ego (at least my ego) wants to be the knower. Letting your ego go can serve everyone better.

💬 Final Takeaway

A limited view, when paired with unconscious bias, is a risky combo. It can distort your thinking, alienate people, and block important opportunities.

But curiosity — paired with discernment and active listening — leads to better decisions, deeper relationships, and greater leadership.

So the next time you're tempted to say "I know," try saying:

“I wonder…”

You just might discover something better than being right.